I wanted to cry during my entire shift and the days following. In fact I did cry to George. Actually, I would compare the whining and crying more to one of Nyah's tantrums. He stuck to his guns though and didn't give in and I have now faced the reality that I must work and the best place to work is right here in the hospital.
Speaking of tantrums, I thought we were through the worst of it but Nyah threw one for the record books at the grocery the other day. I am sure all of the people waiting in the check out line are still talking about it and either saying, glad we're not the only ones, or holy shit, what the heck is wrong with that child/mother.
Anyway, working isn't so bad, I still have a lot of friends in the hospital who I didn't realize I missed until I saw and had a chance to catch up with. It does feels nice to think critically again though I majorly resist it for some reason. I can pick my own schedule so I work mostly when George is home. Elsa has been by twice on this twelve hour shift to snack. I got to see Nyah also which is fun because she is totally into the hospital, doctor, who's a patient, I am a doctor thing. My stethoscope is like a treasure to her.
Working two days a week isn't all that bad, a lot better schedule than some harder working moms out there who deserve ultimate props. Honestly, I do enjoy helping those who are truley sick though those patients can be few a far between here. I have discovered since coming back to work though, out of my blissful state of motherhood, that I am no longer an ER Nurse. I no longer get off on the adrenaline rush a true emergency brings. Shucks.
So my outlook is better, thanks to the ever strong and positive man of the house and I am so thankful I have a job and still get to be a mom at the same time. Hopefully, this will get us one step closer to having a house with a yard with waves crashing in the background.
I needed a time out, I took it and I feel much better. Now let the emergencies occur.